Captain's Blog

The Eve of the New Year

Captain's Blog; December 31, in the year two thousand and eight.  25 Days before we reach the Key in Key West.

The little locket doesn't cry anymore: she knows we be coming for her.

This be the eve of the New Year. What me thinks I cast away, seems to be emerging from the shadows in some new form I can recall and use.  This be not just a tale of loss and abandonment; it be a tale of recognizing outlines and landmarks in order to find one's bearings. The past will surely find us. And how will we be when it does? 

On deck the crew be shoutin' their New Years' Resolutions!  "Plenty O grog! Aye! Plenty O treasure! Aye matey!  More lovin'! Yo Ho ho!"  Their laughter fills the sails as we journey onward. Meself, I make no such resolutions. Me list is a Vision list: how do I make lasting changes? No mere to do list, but a to -be list. On our way to this night, I had such fear of failure and insecurity on where we be headed and why. This New Year fills me with hope. Christmas brought us miracles: they were there to reinstate me faith.  This be me course. I do not know why I be headed to the key in Key West,  but I move towards the Key with new resolve.  Perhaps it be not the destination, but the journey.

LaGrange be makin' notations in the Waggoner while the seacat yawns and stretches nearby on the desk.

-Captain Morgan La Fey

www.destinyvoyages.;com/KeyWest2009/

Juliana Coles Visual Journaling Retreat

Emerging from the Shadows

Captain's Blog; December 30, in the year two thousand and eight.  26 Days before we reach the Key in Key West.

Page after tiny page of abandonment and sorrow. We search each journal spread for clues.  Where be this land that keeps her?  LaGrange studies every minute detail.  We will find her, even if we have to sail to Fiddler's Green and back.

In the next page LaGrange sees a land mass that be recognized in the curious shape of her arm. The Falcon refers to one of the strange Russian charts of Key West. It be exact. Me rushes to the helm.  "Come up, Helmsman! Back on course Sailor!" "Aye, aye Cap'n!" And as the bow points closer to the wind, I suspect these parallel journeys are truly one.

"One does not discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore for a very long time. " - Andre Gide

-Captain Morgan La Fey

www.destinyvoyages.com/KeyWest2009/

Extreme Journalism Retreat with Juliana Coles January 25-30, 2009

Fragile Little One

Captain's Blog; December 29, in the year two thousand and eight.  27 Days before we reach the Key in Key West.

Using a magnifying glass, I see little words written by a tiny hand.  "To My Mother:  Where did you go?  I miss you so much.  I brought home a little basket today, but didn't get to show you.  Where are you?  From: Your Fragile Little One". 

-Captain Morgan La Fey

www.destinyvoyages.com/KeyWest2009/

Juliana Coles Extreme Journalism Retreat January 25-30 in Key West

Parallel Journeys

Captain's Blog: December 28, in the year two thousand and eight. 28 days before we reach Key West. 

Sometimes, no matter how fateful something appears, no matter how important  destiny may indicate itself, one must let go. Too often we face life and say what we could have done or should have been.  Me hears the cry and would like to stay invulnerable. But today I accepts me humanity. I have traveled thus far to discover me own destiny:  be it not what me thinks nor wishes.   Me journey now becomes more potent than I ever bargained for. We must find this child. She be out there somewhere, and her journal pages give us clear direction. LaGrange has set this new course. The falcon believes there be a parallel journey to the one we now travel. We can find her, and still maintain our naviagation for Key West. I ain't no father, no mother, but aye,  I be the child of a fisherman, and it be time to go a fishin'.

-Captain Morgan La fey

www.destinyvoyages.com/KeyWest2009/

Juliana Coles Visual Journaling Retreat January 25-30 2009 in Key West

The Stowaway

Captain's Blog; December 27, in the year two thousand and eight.  29 Days before we reach the Key in Key West.

At the helm me stands, icy wind whipping me face. I be preparin' for this all me life. I was born for this. Aye, I be a sailor true and true.

"Cap'n," LaGrange interupts me reverie. "Cap'n, I believe we have a stowaway. Ye best come below." I leave  her Majesty's Black Swan to the Helmsman and follow LaGrange to me cabin.

"Matey, where be this stowaway?" I inquire, as I peer around me empty cabin. "Listen Captain, listen." I fold me arms across me chest and quiet meself. "Falcon," me says, "I hear noth.." "Avast! Cap'n! Listen!" And there it be, a hushed whimpering. "All right ye scallywagger! Come out from yer hidin'!"  But the whimperin' turns to cries. It sounds like a little girl. "All right, there, there now, ye come out little one, we won't hurt ya." LaGrange and I  gaze at each other nervously. "All right Falcon, where she be?" "Captain, I have looked everywhere.  I can hear her, but I cannot locate her."  How be that - she be here somewhere.  I move closer to the sound of her voice.  I bend down, listening. She be so near.  I lower my head.  I extend my hand to lean in closer when it brushes the smaller locket I dropped two days before, on Christmas.  I gently pick it up. I hold it to my ear, like a seashell, and I hear the mournful weeping of the girl child.  I can hear her cry, who is there?  Who is there?  Papi?  I appeal to LaGrange.  When we first viewed the lockets, this smaller one had no pages. But since I dropped it thoughtlessly upon the plank flooring, the tiny cover has broken to reveal hidden pages that are even smaller than the other locket. I delicately hold the tiny golden locket in my palm, the chain slipping through me fingers, listening to her cries.  What dare say I?  LaGrange collects the locket and puts it under the magnifying glass. It be a young girl's journal.

-Captain Morgan La Fey

www.destinyvoyages.com/KeyWest2009/

Juliana Coles Extreme Journalism Retreat January 25-30 in Key West

Right Action

Captain's Blog: December 26, in the year two thousand and eight.   30 days before we reach Key West.

We have safely navigated the cape, and the mysterious current releases us into open water.  Our whale convoy bids us farewell as they move Northward. I can still hear them calling me home as a sense of peace replaces the "Saudade" that has plagued the Black Swan and her crew for weeks.

With colors flying high in a wintry sky me dedicated sailors have gone back to their shiply duties and LaGrange has returned to studying the charts. When all on deck seems shipshape, I go below to consult with LaGrange.  Whilst we review the Waggoner, Seacat Master Petey, curled up on newly unrolled charts, purrs contentedly.

This is how we gather strength to continue; by right action. By doing what we can and what we must.  By going through the motions.  By returning to our duties and what we know.  This is how we get back on track. We assess the journey thus far and then we make resolutions on how to proceed further. When in doubt, take a step. Swab the decks, organize, create order, clear out what no longer seems to support the voyage. When faced with uncertainty, we start by starting. Meself I get me hand to the page and begin. I write, "Captain's Log" and then the date, and then something flows from there. This is how we resurrect the spirit of the journey that seems to have gotten lost or buried within. We don't start over, we start where we are:  we start by starting.

-Captain Morgan La Fey

www.destinyvoyages.com/KeyWest2009/

Juliana Coles Extreme Journalism Retreat in Key West January 25-30

The Gift of the Magi

Captain's Blog; December 25, in the year two thousand and eight. 31 days until we reach our destiny in Key West. 

A celebration at sea continues as today be the day of Christmas. The search for the grail, me own search for an unknown treasure, be a parallel inner journey to kindle the light within. In order to better be known, I have traveled outside meself to the ends O' the earth. When I find me treasure, I will have come home. Today, I contemplate how a Captain of the Wild Blue can ever find a home on this endless voyage. I pick up the smaller locket, the one with no inner pages, and dangle it by its chain. Golden light dances off it in a thin ray of sunlight cast upon my desk.

There be a ruckus on deck, and I drop the locket and run to the bow of the ship to discover the commotion;  me fears a drowning.  To me amazement and wonder, 3 whales be leading our way like seahorses pulling a chariot. Their eerie calls of love echo and revel in this expanse of sea and sky.  I climb out onto the bowsprit to partake in this parade of old souls and ancient wisdom and feel in me, a light shining brighter. I cannot explain it - me tears are masked by the splashing waves of rise and plunge and rise and plunge. Every moment, no matter where I venture, I am home. I am home. Glory be.

-Captain Morgan La Fey

School of the Sea Journal page by Alison Trundle

www.destinyvoyages.com/KeyWest2009/

Juliana Coles Extreme Journalism Retreat January 25-30 2009

Magnified at Sea

Captain's Blog: December 24, in the year two thousand and eight.  32 days before we reach Key West.

It be the Eve of Christmas in the middle of nowhere.  The sky and the ocean be black save for stars that twinkle above as below.  LaGrange compares it to the unification of upper and lower Egypt; the Nile being an exact mirror of the Milky Way.

While the cooper plays an enchanting tune upon the fiddle, the Black Swan heaves her proud chest on every wave like the sound of a drum.  In the galley, a feast be celebrated by all;  hardtack, salt dried meats, plenty of grog, and sweet coconut cakes!

There be something about this winter holiday of Christmas that be... what be the right word, hopeful?  Positive?  I think it be a time for gathering courage, actually.  People around the globe seek comfort and strength in ritual and belongingness and remembrances while real winter still be ahead.  There is a tiny life and light that must be protected and nurtured for the sake of the future.   I think we gather and feast and light candles and such to prepare our souls for the difficult times that we fear lie ahead.  Gathering our courage to do what must be done.

What must be done?

-Captain Morgan La Fey

www.destinyvoyages.com/KeyWest2009/

Juliana Coles Visual Journaling Retreat January 25-30 in Key West

Diving Dove

Captain's Blog: December 23, in the year two thousand and eight. 33 days until we reach Key West.

Another dark wintry night.  Loneliness has settled in.  The mood aboard ship is somber. Doubt seems to fill every once hopeful space.  LaGrange's mysterious maps and charts are rolled tight.  The Waggoner remains closed and gathers dust.  The lockets, medallion, coin and secret letters be locked in the chest. No more excitement towards the inner search we were on. I felt so sure about everything and now...how can I guarantee riches beyond our imagination when I don't even believe it meself. I be sailin' some wild goose chase. I be seekin' the "Black Swan": something that does not, and cannot exist.

The clock nears midnight. Another day. Another dark day. I look up and me eyes catch the gaze of LaGrange. I try to focus on the falcon's eyes: they see everything unseen.  They dart left and right. What do they see?

The crew exhales at once as all sights on board the Black Swan follow the strange flight pattern of a lone white dove. It be an omen fer sure for it be impossible: I hear me own words: do not believe in what does not exist and cannot exist.  And yet here, on deck, so close to each sailor, the flight of the white dove. I can't escape me logic, though reality tells me different. But what do I know of reality? Be this an illusion?  Nay, every sailor be witness. How be this?

With another flutter of wings, the dove dives into the sea. The crew races to the side, but no sign of her.  No, I think, she will not return, she is with her sleeping family beneath the sea.  Snow begins to fall, and In spite of me fears, in spite of me doubts, in spite of everything or nothing, something in me surrenders to me unknowing.  Below the helm, across the deck, LaGrange picks up the gift of a white feather.

-Captain Morgan La Fey

www.destinyvoyages.com/KeyWest2009/

Juliana Coles Visual Journaling Retreat January 25-30 in Key West

Lost Words

Captain's Blog: December 22, in the year two thousand and eight. 34 days before we reach Key West.

There is quiet and stillness as we sail along in this dark of winter. There be not much to do, Her Majesty's Black Swan seems to navigate this secret waterway herself.  The feeling of Saudade, the Barbary Corsair's Portugese term for a state of deep grief, surrounds this ship and her crew.  I thought we had destiny in the wind and on our side, but now I just feel the emptiness of inarticulated emotions, lost words, opportunites never acted upon, gifts not taken... Alas, I be not the only one;  we all heard strange voices and saw visions! We all thought we were on a journey that would lead us to our full potential. Now I question our unknown course, like questioning my faith:  what is my past, what did I leave, what am I doing here, what did I think the key would unlock?  Lo, where be my treasure hidden?  I feel despair at having had such hopes for me crew and meself.  In anguish, I look up at this dark sky and see a bright beaming celestial body.  In the ocean, like a reflection of the night, the Black Swan changes her course and seems to sail into the light of that shining star. Onboard, drops of water seem to twinkle in the starlight. I look down at me damp coat, and it sparkles like diamonds.

-Captain Morgan La Fey

www.destinyvoyages.com/KeyWest2009/

Juliana Coles 2009 Visual Journaling Retreat January 25-30.